The Hands That Should Have Held You

My baby brother,
My baby sister,
My heart aches for you.
I wore a band for you today,
But I couldn’t save you.
My heart breaks;
To know that you faced death alone,
And tomorrow you will face it alone again,
With no arms to hold you,
And no voice to soothe you,
My heart breaks.
Your cries were unanswered,
As they rang out through that darkness.
Your screams were silenced,
But I hear them in my heart.
Your screams were silenced,
But I feel them in my soul.
You were a light,
But they snuffed you out.
You were a song,
But they broke your strings.

So much pain,
So much fear.
You were looking,
You were crying,
For the hands that should have held you,
But instead they held the money
To pay for your death.
So much pain,
So much fear,
I am breaking,
I am crying,
For not being there to hold you;
For that smile that should have graced our world, that now we’ll never see.

I was where you are once;
Not just in the womb,
But unplanned, and a burden.
I was a burden on my mother,
Her mind already crumpling,
From bearing the burden of her world.
Had it been today,
She might have done the same;
Under pressure from these people,
I might have shared your pain.
I don’t know why I get to live,
While you are forced to die.
I don’t know why I get to breathe,
While your breath is taken away.
I’ll never know how my mother could love me that much,
And I cannot answer why your mother has not.

I wish there was a way,
For me to tell you that you’re loved.
A way that I could tell you,
That you’re written on my heart.
Baby brother,
Baby sister,
No; your mother didn’t love you.
But I did, I swear I did,
And I will not forget you.
I never got to meet you,
But I loved you just the same,
And for as long as justice fails you, my heart will break for your pain.


Written in the week that the protection of babies who survive an abortion was refused in America.

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